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Saturday, January 03, 2009

Breaking news: Apple launches laptop with no keyboard

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Salaryman Ninja Squad

I arrived at Kudanshita a little early this morning, and was astonished to stumble across the legendary Salaryman Ninja Squad.

Managed to sneak a shot of them holding their Chou-rei (morning meeting) without getting my head sliced off by one of the razor-sharp computer keyboards they all carry under their coats.

salaryman high commission_2122

Needless to say, Pepe was pretty interested in this phenomenon too, and using his penguin charm was able to attach gps trackers to the insides of their umbrellas.

pepe and the salary man gang_2121

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Monday, November 10, 2008

Don't unchi



Recent breakthroughs in Brainy Animal Research Kommunications technology (or BARK for short) has enabled residents in Tokyo's Meguro-ward to enroll their dogs in new reading and writing classes. The move is part of an effort to educate the canine community in street manners - notably those connected with unchi (poos).

Here we see one of the new signs now being introduced for the educated class of wanwans along kerb stones telling them not to do do-do's in inappropriate locations.

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Sunday, November 09, 2008

Please do it at a pub

do it at home_0421

What I want to know if why has the salary man replaced his eye balls with golf balls?

(This is one in a series of posters on the Tokyo Subway encouraging good manners. See the whole series here)

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Saturday, August 30, 2008

Passed de TEFL Now I'm Qualified

We had a bit of free time this afternoon - this went from idea to YouTube in 30 minutes :-)

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

Won't Sell

This is what happens when Mrs Dribblethwaite of 56 Leopold Avenue refuses to sell the family home.

won't sell

(As seen in London yesterday)

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Thursday, July 31, 2008

Peter's Crazy Tomatoes

News on the wedding will follow shortly.

In the meantime please enjoy my father's crazy tomatoes.

They are called Mr and Mrs Crazy Tomato.

peter's crazy tomatoes_9216

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Tuesday, June 17, 2008

National Sheep Day

To celebrate National Sheep Day, this morning I jogged up Garway Hill in order to get some shots of Horace, the sheep that starred in last year's best-selling Hollywood action film Revenge of the Wooly Jumpers.

garway sheep_7789

I asked Horace if he'd mind re-creating the scene where he'd just been attacked by the Mighty bear, and badly wounded is seen crying to the heavens for the strength to make it through the epic battle.

garway sheep_7795

This is Hatty, Horace's Love Interest. Here she stands at the top of the cliff in despair, giving that final devastating speech. I was in tears when I saw it in the cinema.

garway sheep_7822

Don't give up the search Betty! Separated from her children, Betty surveys the landscape, fearing that they have lost their way and have wandered beyond the foreboding Black Mountains.

garway sheep_7809

But Fear Not! Horace the Mighty has returned! This is the scene where he speaks to the flock in those rousing tones, inspiring confidence once more in the hooved troops. All is set for the most extraordinary victory ever seen in the history of Sheep.

garway sheep_7788

Now, where did I put my pills...?

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Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Penguins, Mars and dance steps

I found some amazing footage today of a colony of flying penguins on the BBC iPlayer. (sadly only available to UK viewers, I think, or if you're my Facebook friend you can see it there)

Meanwhile, Virgin and Google have teamed up to launch Project Virgle - they're establishing a colony on Mars! Thing is though, we can apply to join it! Start a new life over, be a pioneer! It's really tempting.



In other news, I note that Gmail users can now send emails in the past! This is great news, I can now reply to emails before I've even received them - talk about being efficient!

Oh oh oh and check this out - Interview with Steve Jobs on Mahola daily!

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Friday, March 28, 2008

Second major photo shoot: Simon

I got a call early this morning from my agent asking that I ready my camera for another photo shoot for a major client. This was really exciting, and a major step up from my first assignment in February which saw me focus upon dead fish.

The photos are to appear in next month's Cosmopolitan magazine as a part of their series on the latest fashions for famous reptiles.

So, this afternoon, close-up lens loaded and batteries fully charged, I made my way to the studio at the end of the garden where none other than Simon the Slow Worm was waiting!

Yes, Simon the Slow Worm! I could scarcely believe that I had been lucky enough to be chosen from amongst the many professional photographers in the area to work with Simon, who is of course well known for his outlandish performance on the BBC's I'm a Celebrity With No legs!, and his stunning performance at last years Eurovision Song Contest.

Simon, he's such a tease...

I got through about 10 rolls of film trying to catch that legendary smile of his, but I think I managed it quite well. Oh, and he did his seductive contortion thing, with the tail flick that so famously caused Madonna to swoon during filming of Evita 15 years ago.


For the Simon the Slow Worm fans amongst the DM readership I've posted more images from the shoot here.

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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

After 14 years they rose again


Anne Tame the artist, at work

I'm back on the Welsh garden Project site today. It's good being here and doing some physical work. My hands smell of cow skin, and I have a delicious feeling of knackeredness. Thought I'd take advantage of the lack of rain and get the chainsaw out; spent an hour or so doing a circuit of the garden, dealing with the trees that were felled by the recent gales. With a new chain it makes for satisfying work, quickly cutting through broken boughs and branches to relieve the burden being felt by surrounding trees. It appeals to the tidyman in me too. I like natural-looking gardens, but I especially like tidy natural looking gardens. 

Opening the garage for the first time in a while, I smelt death. It was a strong smell, no mistaking it. It was rising from the corpse of a large rabbit that must have been chased in there by Taize the cat some time ago.

Coming back in at lunchtime I found that same cat sleeping with my pet penguin, Pepe.



What you lookin at?



The morning-after shot: The powerful Tom has had his way; Pepe is left with conflicting feelings regarding his own sexual orientation. 


After lunch, it was back out to clear up the polytunnel. 

But I wasn't really in the polytunnel emptying out last year's tomato plant pots. Instead, I was in that sanatorium in Japan with Naoko and Reiko, as described in Murakami's Norwegian Wood which I'm continuing to listen to, and liking very much. I love being read to. 

(I've just come across a source for free audiobooks at http://librivox.org. I'll give them a whizz as it's a while before I can get any more on subscription from Audible).

I'm pretty good at multi-tasking. As well as listening to a book and clearing up a polytunnel, I was wearing my 'new' patchwork trousers.


I found them under the bed the other night. They aren't really 'new', as I've already worn them for a couple of years, from early 1994 to 1995. I  got them when I was about 16, and had them coat my legs almost everyday during my year at sixth form college. I think they were supposed to attract girls as they have home-installed zips running almost the entire length of each leg. Unfortunately they didn't really work, and in the end I had to leave the country to lose my virginity.

Anyway, they still fit me, both in terms of waistline and length, so I think I'll give them another spin.

Righty ho, on with 'stuff'.

[edit] it has been pointed out that the cat has had his testicles removed, and thus it is unlikely that he was actually having sexual intercourse with Pepe, which is a bit of a relief as if they had become too close Taize may have taken advantage of his being a cat and eaten him.

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Sunday, March 09, 2008

MacBook AirCraft

I see apple have responded to the complaints...

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